Policy on Corruption

Under successive Labor Governments, Australia has gone from being one of the least corrupt countries in the world to one of the most corrupt. Everything is rigged: court cases, surgical operations, even university examinations. In response to public concern about the increasing corruption, Labor Governments have set up dozens of sham complaint agencies. These are designed to make people think that they are the only person in the country with a grievance against the government, when in actual fact the majority of people in Australia have serious grievances against the government.

It is a waste of time writing to these agencies. Instead, what you need is a Mainstream Party Member of Parliament, who can ask awkward questions in parliament on your behalf, and introduce private members’ bills to fix the situation for you and other people in your position. Labor and Liberal politicians will not do anything, and do not care what their constituents think. Labor politicians are only interested in impressing their parish priests. The priest is the only constituent who a Labor politician cares about. Liberal politicians are only interested in impressing their mothers with fancy job titles. The only way a Liberal politician can be called “Honourable” is if it is part of his job title.

If we are elected, we will abolish all complaint agencies, and their staff will have their personnel files marked, “Never to be Reemployed”. We will have only two complaint agencies, an Ombudsman and a “Truth and Reconciliation Commission”. A typical Ombudsman agency in a large State will employ three Queen’s Counsels, and twenty graduates with worthwhile degrees and who are under the age of 25. The Ombudsman and all other staff of the agency will all be employed on a temporary basis, and will all be replaced after one year working for the agency. All incoming complaints will have to be read by a Queen’s Counsel.

There are many things that the major parties say is corrupt that we don’t think is corrupt. We don’t think it is corrupt for politicians to fly everywhere by helicopter. We don’t think it is corrupt for politicians to take their wives or mistresses with them on overseas trips. We don’t think it is corrupt for the government not to accept the lowest tender for a contract. We will abolish all registers of interests for politicians and other such nonsense.

It is quite acceptable for the very rich to pay political parties for special treatment. For example, instead of taking your grievance to court, you should be able to pay for a politician to consider your grievance, and then have the verdict implemented by a special Act of Parliament. The whole idea of employing judges is that they are supposed to take the workload off politicians, by adjudicating disputes on behalf of politicians.

We will set up a “Truth and Reconciliation Commission” as a standing Royal Commission type inquiry into hate-crimes committed by Catholics, and especially Labor politicians, against mainstream Australians. Most Labor Party policies count as hate-crimes under international law. For example, employing mainly Catholic public servants in a Protestant country technically amounts to apartheid, and apartheid is a hate-crime. In addition to being able to subpoena documents and compel witnesses to give evidence, the Commission will be able to award damages and order criminal prosecutions. Payback time is at hand, and the “Politically Correct” era of Australian politics is drawing to a close.